One of my many glamorous tasks at work is to groom an English Angora rabbit named Hufflepuff. This picture is not her, but you get the idea. I tried to get around it for about a year by saying I was allergic to her, which I very mildly am, but was called out on this and it is now a daily task. As you might imagine this includes brushing out her fur and clipping her nails, but what you might not want to imagine is me having to wash out her vulva also.
Without getting too graphic, a rabbits vulva has two deep pockets on either side of her external lady bits that collect a great amount of smegma almost daily. I'm getting a little queasy just typing this. Hopefully, you are too, because it's a disgusting job and I should not have to suffer alone.
The worst part? The smell. Sour and cheesy.
So I haven't been to work in two weeks due to an "unpaid furlough" if you will and therefore haven't had to wash rabbit vagina for two whole weeks. Today I ate bagels and cream cheese. Then I went to my OB/GYN appointment this afternoon where I was biting my fingernails and caught a wiff of something familiar, and horrific. My fingers smell like rabbit vagina. I blamed the cream cheese and went and washed my hands. It didn't work very well.
Somewhere, Hufflepuff is laughing.
