I knew that it was very common to poop on the delivery table, I was prepared for that. And by "prepared for that" I mean I made sure that I did my business before I was too far gone into labor to not. I watched my friend give birth many years ago and the thing I remember most about the delivery wasn't the beautiful miracle, but instead my friend calling out "ooohh I'm pooping!" and several large turds coming out.
When it came down to it, they told me "push like you're having a big bowel movement". I did, but I still held back a little, much to the frustration of my doctor and nurses.
A few days ago H-man and I were reminiscing on the labor, and I said to him "you know when they told me to basically poop on the table? Well, I didn't push all the way, not because I didn't want to poop in front of everyone. I was more afraid that I would let out a huge fart, and then I would have had to die."
And that's the truth. Women are silly.
